What Pantomimes Are On This Year

You know that moment when your six-year-old nephew turns to you, mid-chorus of “He’s Behind You!”, and asks with deadly seriousness, “Auntie, why is that man wearing a dress AND a beard?” I didn’t have an answer. I just pointed at the villain, who was now having a bucket of custard thrown at his face, and whispered, “Just... go with it.” That’s the magic of pantomime. It’s chaos, it’s glitter, and it’s somehow the most British thing you’ll do all December.

So, what is on this year? Let’s be real: every theatre within a fifty-mile radius is doing a panto. Obviously. But you don’t want to end up at the dud—the one where the “dame” has lost his timing and the audience is booing ironically instead of laughing. I’ve done the digging so you can look like the hero who booked the good seats.

The Big Name Players (You Know Them From Telly)

Let’s start with the heavy hitters. In London, the London Palladium is doing Peter Pan. And by “doing,” I mean it’s a £200-a-ticket spectacle with a celebrity who was on Strictly four years ago. Julian Clary is back as the dame, and if you’ve never seen him raise an eyebrow while a child screams “Wibble!”—you’re missing a masterclass in dad-joke confidence.

Up North, the Manchester Opera House has Dick Whittington staring a soap star you vaguely remember from Coronation Street. Honestly, half the fun is spotting which talent show reject is playing the fairy. Last year, I saw a former X Factor contestant sing “Let It Go” as a cat. It was dreadful. I loved every second.

Local Gems (Where the Custard Flies Fresh)

But let’s be honest—the real pantos are in your local town hall. You know the one: the venue that smells faintly of floor polish and desperation. My local theatre in Brighton is doing Aladdin, and the genie is played by a man who retired from a job at the council. His lamp is a teapot. The jokes are about the price of a pint. It’s perfect.

If you’re in a smaller town, check the listings for The Old Rep or the arts centre that doubles as a bowling alley on Tuesdays. They’ll have Cinderella or Snow White. The key? Look for the show that brags about having “a real horse on stage.” That horse will not be a real horse. It’ll be two blokes in a brown onesie, and you will lose your mind when it waddles sideways.

The Trends This Year (Yes, Pantos Have Trends)

First trend: pop songs. Every panto now has a moment where the villain stops the plot to do a medley of Taylor Swift’s “Anti-Hero” while the audience throws glow sticks. It’s a terrible narrative choice. I love it. Don’t fight it—just clap along.

Metro Theatre Pantomime – Le Metropolitan Opera : saison 2025-2026 – VSJA

Second: “interactive” villains. The bad guy will spend five minutes shouting at the kids in the front row. One panto in Bristol has a villain who reportedly throws soft foam slippers at adults who yawn. Yes, I checked the website. Yes, it’s in the small print. “Management reserves the right to pelt lethargic audience members.” Brilliant.

The “Don’t Bother” List (Save Your Money)

Avoid any panto that uses the phrase “traditional family entertainment” in its headline. That’s code for “we have zero budget and the dame is the janitor in a wig.” Also, if the ticket price includes a “free” plastic wand—run. You’ll pay £8 for that wand, and it will snap before the interval. Trust me.

Also, steer clear of Jack and the Beanstalk unless you love watching a giant made of cardboard wobble for twenty minutes. There’s a reason every panto does Sleeping Beauty: no set pieces needed. You just need a princess, a bed, and a fairy with a really loud voice.

How to Pick the Right One for You

Going with kids? Prioritise the messy ones. Look for “slosh scene” in the description. That means there will be water guns, custard, and a 100% chance of a child getting hit in the face with a fake pie. That child will remember it forever. Their parents will not, but still.

Pantomimes in Yorkshire: 15 productions taking place before the end of

Going with mates who want a laugh? Choose a panto at a pub theatre. They’ll be rude, loud, and the actors will drink real beer on stage. One in Leeds does a version of Sleeping Beauty where the prince is a delivery driver. The fairy says “Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo” and then complains about traffic. It’s genius.

If you’re going solo—yes, many do!—pick a matinee. The audience is older, slower, and way more likely to heckle the dame about his wig. I once saw an 80-year-old woman shout “Fix it, love!” during a solo. The dame stopped, adjusted his hair, and winked at her. That’s the relationship you want.

Final, Slightly Sarcastic Checklist

So, what do you do next? Check your local theatre’s website. If the panto listing has a blurry photo of a man in a dress holding a scepter, book immediately. If the photo shows a professional cast smiling warmly? Hard pass. You want the chaos, not the polish.

And remember: if you don’t shout “Oh no you didn’t!” at least six times, you haven’t done it right. The actress playing the fairy expects your vocal support. She is working for minimum wage, in a glitter corset, on a Tuesday night. She needs you.

Go on, get booking. And if you see a man in a beard and a dress, just smile and whisper, “Go with it.”