How Many Jd Wetherspoon Pubs Are There

So, picture this: you’re halfway through a very reasonably priced pint, munching on a plate of chips the size of your head. The question pops into your mind, unbidden, like a rogue cheese-and-onion ring. How many of these glorious, carpeted sanctuaries are there, really?

It’s the kind of trivia you need to win a pub quiz, or at least to justify your third coffee of the day. Let’s dive into the greasy, glorious numbers behind JD Wetherspoon. Grab a fork—this might get messy.

The Big, Spinning Number

As of the latest count—because they open and close them like I open bags of crisps—the number hovers around 830 to 850 pubs. Yes, you read that right. Almost a thousand places where you can get a full English breakfast for less than a fiver.

That number includes pubs in the UK and Ireland. And a few in… well, mostly the UK. They did try a couple in the US and France once. It went about as well as a dry January at a Oktoberfest.

The Great British Invasion

The backbone of the empire is, of course, the UK. You can’t walk ten feet in a British town without tripping over one. It’s almost a law of physics at this point.

England alone holds the lion’s share—something like 700 pubs. Think of it: that’s enough to host a national championship of 'Who can stay awake on the sticky carpet longest.' Scotland and Wales get a healthy dose, too. Glasgow has a few crackers, and Cardiff practically has one on every corner.

The Irish Outpost

Ireland, bless its heart, has a respectable 30-odd pubs. That’s a whole bunch of craic (and cheap Guinness) for the price of a bus ticket. You get the same glorious shagpile carpets, but with a lilt in the air.

A look at the rise and fall of JD Wetherspoon as it closes 32 pubs

Are They All Still… There?

Here’s the rub, my friend. Wetherspoons, like your grandad after a Sunday roast, has been shrinking a little. In the last few years, they’ve shut down dozens of pubs. It’s a culling of the Spoons herd.

Rent went up. Energy bills went up. The price of baked beans went up (a national crisis). So, Sir Tim Martin, the boss with opinions louder than his ties, started selling off the less profitable ones. That old pub on the high street you loved? Might be a vape shop now. Sorry.

Why Does This Number Even Matter?

You might be thinking, "Why does this affect my life?" Because, my friend, it’s a metric of national stability. When the number of Spoons drops, the economy is wobbling. When it rises, it means we’re all losing our minds in unison over £1.50 coffee.

Each one is a microcosm of British life. You get the bloke reading a newspaper, the group of teens nursing a single Coke for three hours, and the couple having a very serious argument about holiday insurance. It’s a beautiful, budget-friendly mess.

Wetherspoons to open 15 new pubs across UK, some 'in weeks' - full list

The Missing London Ones

Don’t forget the city. London has a massive concentration—over 100 Spoons alone. From the massive one at Victoria Station to the tiny, hidden ones in alleys, they are everywhere. You could, in theory, do a pub crawl using only Wetherspoons. I do not recommend this. You would die. But you’d die cheaply.

So, The Final Tally?

Right now, in 2024, the magic number is roughly 835. Give or take a few that closed while you were reading this sentence. It’s a moving target, like a greasy spoon on wheels.

That number includes your local, the one you’ve been meaning to visit for a "quick one" that turned into five. It includes the one in the airport where you bought a lukewarm panini. It’s an institution, a ground-zero for bargain-hunters everywhere.

What’s Next?

Will the number go up or down? Your guess is as good as mine. Sir Tim might wake up tomorrow and decide to open one in a converted shed. Or close another one because the rent for the ghost of a Victorian pub got too high.

One thing is certain: the next time you walk into one, remember you’re part of an 835-strong family. A family that smells faintly of disinfectant and cheap coffee. And chips. So many chips.